I admit, I live to please people and that’s for all aspects of my life. Whether it be my social life, my dating life, or my work life, my happiness comes from making other people happy. Over time, though, I’ve come to realize how dangerous being a people pleaser is, especially if you’re willing to bend over backwards every single time for other people. Especially in work situations, wouldn’t it be better if we were well-liked and agreeable? Well, turns out that’s another name for “incapable of setting healthy boundaries”. If you’ve come to realize you’re someone like me, you’re in luck because I’m here to teach you how to set healthy boundaries at work.
Setting boundaries starts as early as the job interview process. From then on, you should make it clear to your colleagues and employers the kind of treatment you allow. This prevents you from putting yourself in toxic situations and avoid having people take advantage of you. However, before you set your boundaries, you first need to assess your wants and your limits. Your life does not solely revolve around your job. It also revolves around everything involving your life outside work, like your home, relationships, hobbies, etc.
When you have assessed what your boundaries are, communicate them with your team. For example, you could let them know you don’t check emails after a certain time. You could also explain to them what you would consider a work emergency that would require you to do any kind of work-related activity after hours. Doing this will avoid any future miscommunication between you and your team because they are more aware of your boundaries.
I think the most important thing in setting boundaries is knowing when to say no. This is something I still struggle with at times because it’s always easier said than done. However, if we don’t practice saying no, both parties could be at a disadvantage. For example, if you are being asked to do a task that is outside your responsibility or one you simply cannot do because of your workload, accepting it may lead to you compromising your other tasks or not being able to provide the best output due to lack of knowledge in doing it.
Lastly, take time off. You deserve it! Don’t save up all your holidays only for it to expire at the end of the year. Use the time off you have to do something not work-related. Spending all your days at work will only lead to a burnout, and that is something you want to avoid at all costs.
I know learning how to set boundaries is not something that happens overnight, and you will experience pushbacks from time to time. Do not feel frustrated, though. Take the pushback as an opportunity to gently instruct your colleagues about your boundaries. However, if they are aware of it and yet constantly overstep it, then you just might be in a toxic work environment.